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Answering Your Mom’s Top 3 Questions About Law School

With the recent passage of this year’s Mother’s Day, we got to thinking, what would a mom want to ask her soon-to-be law student? As someone who was once a law a student, and as someone who has a mom, I feel at least 95% qualified to answer that question. And thusly (who doesn’t love an unnecessary suffix?) I bring you a list of things your mom may or may not ask you as you head off to law school.

Mom’s Law School Question I: What are you going to practice?

You can try to placate relatives with assurances that you’ll have it figured out by the time you graduate, but mothers generally require answer of greater depth. Just pray she knows just as little as you do about what you’re actually going to do with your law degree and tell her that you’re probably going to end up doing some “transactional” work. Any more detail than that is almost certainly a lie, especially before you have any real experience.

Mom’s Law School Question II: What are you going to do for food?

Good news for you: free food is even easier to find in law school than it was in undergrad. Lexis, Westlaw and any number of other product peddlers and organizations will almost certainly try to curry your favor with pizza, burgers, cookies and the like. You can lie to Mom all you want about how much you’re going to cook for yourself and bring lunch to school, but you and I both know that nary a law student can resist the call of free pizza.

Mom’s Law School Question III: Are you going to find a wife/husband in law school?

I’m going to give you the advice I’ve given everybody else I’ve met: don’t date fellow law students. The answer to Mom’s question here goes something like, “I’m lawyer enough for myself. I’ll find a mate outside of school.” No doubt some of you will fall into the trap of dating for convenience, but few of those relationships will last. Find the yin to your yang, rather than just a bunch more yang. You’ll be better for it and Mom will love seeing you happy.

A belated Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there, and the best of luck to all the future law students who have to answer their questions.