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What Would They Score on the LSAT: Dallas Characters

If you’ve watched the characters in the 2012 revival of the TV show Dallas scheme to screw each other in business and, well, otherwise, you may have wondered what they would all score on the LSAT. What’s that you say? The LSAT never crossed your mind while watching Dallas?

Tough. Here are their LSAT scores*, anyway:

John Ross Ewing — Dallas LSAT score: 142. He’s brash, tempestuous and used to getting his way. While none of those things are necessarily deal-breakers for his LSAT score, he isn’t exactly a deep thinker, bro. Of the characters on Dallas, he’s the most likely to take personal offense at something in an LR question. LSAT test day would also be interesting, since it’s hard to imagine him sitting quietly and taking instructions from the LSAT proctors.

Christopher Ewing — Dallas LSAT score: 165. Bobby Ewing’s adopted son would study diligently for the LSAT. His work in alternative energy shows him to be ambitious and willing to put in the work to achieve his goals. On the other hand, he’s a little too trusting of people (other than John Ross) and willing to take them at their word. He’d have trouble spotting some of the trickier flawed logic on the LSAT just as he has trouble realizing exactly how few people he should trust.

Rebecca Sutter — Dallas LSAT score: 166. Christopher’s fiancée at first, and later his wife, Rebecca may seem at first to be sweet and genuine. As it turns out, she’s as much of a schemer as any of the characters on Dallas. She can’t really stay focused on her schemes, though. She’d study a fair amount for the LSAT, but wouldn’t quite have the determination to knock it out of the park.

Elena Ramos — Dallas LSAT score: 178. The daughter of the Ewing family cook, she’s been romantically involved with both Chris and John Ross. I won’t hold that against her; it’s clear she has a lot on the ball. She’d put in the prep work, go into the LSAT test center, and absolutely kill it as a means to whatever end she was pursuing.

Bobby Ewing — Dallas LSAT score: 158. Christopher’s father would rather take care of his ranch than worry about taking the LSAT and becoming a lawyer. Also, his actions on the show, in which he commits to a course of action (selling Southfork Ranch) because he’s determined that one particular alternative is unacceptable, indicate that he might have trouble spotting exclusivity flaws.

JR Ewing — Dallas LSAT score: 152. John Ross’s father is a shrewd businessman and more motivated by greed than his brother Bobby. So why, of all the Dallas characters, would he score around average on the LSAT? He wouldn’t care. In his way of doing business, his LSAT score would be immaterial and he’d know it. There’s no way he’d be bothered with going to the library and spending hours hitting the LSAT prep books. JR would rather be making deals.

*Of course, all of these Dallas LSAT scores are dependent on how many characters are actually dreaming.