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Sweatpants or No Sweatpants: the Big Questions of Law School

Sweatpants or No Sweatpants: Dixie Answers the Big Questions of Law School

My mission of providing LSAT students with the insider information they are dying to know about law school continues this week. Except I unfortunately ran out of topics to write about. Luckily, I’m tenacious, so to solve the problem I solicited my number one commenter, James Swift, to sit down and talk (aka GChat) with me about some of the questions the kids have.

Since James is actually in the same position of many of our readers (he’ll be starting law school in the fall), some of you may have the same questions. Plus the interview dealt almost exclusively with the most important aspects of law school: drinking, fashion and Facebook. Although we did manage to avoid any discussion of Twilight. My apologies.

James Swift: Let’s start with the most important topic: drinking. Do you still go to frat/house parties?

Dixie Tananbaum: No. Granted, this could a result of going to school in NYC, where an entire apartment is roughly the size of the bathroom at my parents’ house. So parties can get a little cramped. At the same time, most law students are over 21, so I’m sure even in other areas the bar scene becomes much more relevant than it was in undergrad. Which basically means that instead of drinking out of a solo cup in a basement that smells like vomit and shame, you get to drink out of a pint glass in a pub that smells like vomit and shame. Get excited.

JS: I see. Well, now that we got that out of the way, let’s move on. Do jocks still wear their hoodies up during class?

DT: No, but they will still throw you in the trashcan during lunch.

JS: I was afraid of that. Do people still wear sweatpants to class?

DT: Another no. Which is annoying, since I spent most of undergrad as the reigning Queen of the UniColor Sweatsuit. You do see a few hoodie/jeans combos, and every once in a while there is someone who is going to the gym right after class, but for the most part law students put on big boy clothes every morning.

JS: So people get dressed like they’re in the Donald Trump boardroom?

DT: Not dressed up. We aren’t completely pretentious a-holes.

JS: Yet.

DT: You’re going to fit right in. Yes, yet. But at this point, at least, people rarely look like they rolled out of bed and stumbled to class. Although, there are a number of reasons besides class that you may have to wear business casual (or even a suit) on any given day, like interviews or conferences. So it does happen. Without a specific reason though, it’s rare to see people wearing anything special.

JS: So it’s finally acceptable to wear bow ties to school?

DT: Only if you want to look like a douchebag.

JS: That’s my plan. Moving on, have the professors finally learned to use even the simplest forms of technology?

DT: No. But, law school professors are also above having to even try. Law school has a squad of minions who run about the school making sure that everything is set up before any given class. They’re sort of like those AV kids in high school. But unlike high school, this AV squad is not made up of kids who are just trying to get out of class and make out in the TV/VCR closet, but actual employees who are paid to ensure that those Kings of Law School never have to learn that the big button with the green light above is…. wait for it ….. the power switch.

JS: Awesome. Keeping on the topic of technology, will my classmates still have pictures of themselves in bikinis doing body shots posted on Facebook?

DT: Still? Does that happen now?

JS: Yes!

DT: I’m really starting to doubt you go to an actual school. But, to answer your question, probably not. Although there are some people who don’t seem to understand that THE WHOLE WORLD can access your Facebook with just a little bit of tech savvy, for the most part our online personas are pretty tame. Nobody wants to miss out on a job opportunity because of some questionable information found online.

JS: That sucks. Will I have to take down the picture of me in a bikini doing body shots before I start?

DT: Absolutely not. In fact, you should make it your profile picture.

JS: Already done. Ok, but let’s imagine those kind of pictures were posted, would everyone gossip about it?

DT: Sadly, yes. I’m not joking when I compare law school to high school. Unlike undergrad, where you are one of thousands of students (likely) and no one really knows you outside of your major/sorority/sports team, law school is a pretty small group. So although you should enjoy your time, you definitely want to keep yourself under control. If you don’t, some idiot gunner is probably going to exaggerate the rumors that get around and try to get them posted on a legal blog, or something equally ridiculous. In the long run, you want to avoid that.

JS: Agreed. Although I would also like to avoid being thrown into a trashcan.

DT: Not going to happen.

JS: Damn it. Oh well, just figured I’d check. Thanks anyhow.

DT: No problem. I look forward to seeing what comments you decide to leave. And, in a blatant attempt to come up with future topics, invite anyone else to leave any other questions they may have as comments too.

Cue round of applause for the one and only James Swift.