If you’re preparing for the LSAT, your mother isn’t just any mother. She’s the mother of a decently functioning young adult whose plans for the future go beyond watching the next episode of Game of Thrones. For such an exceptional feat of parenting, she deserves special credit. This Mother’s Day, show your mom that you care, LSAT-style.
Here are some heartfelt logical messages (is that a paradox?) you can include in her Mother’s Day card:
· “If it is true that you are my mom, it can be properly inferred that I love you.”
· “All available evidence provides the strongest support for inferring that you are the best mom ever.”
· “If the statements above are put forward as an argument in favor of your maternal splendor, which one of the following there could be no criticism of that argument.”
· “Thank you for always having been primarily concerned with addressing the question of how to be there for me.”
· “Because of you, I am the mostly strongly supported.”
In true lawyer style, let us not only boost our ally, but also denigrate the opposition. Naturally, for this occasion we turn to the “yo mama” variety of argumentation:
· “Yo mama so illogical, her love is unconditional.”
· “Yo mama so illogical, she thought the contrapositive was an antagonistic attitude toward optimism.”
· “Yo mama so illogical, she thought that unsound reasoning meant making deductions silently.”
· “Yo mama so fallacious, even her house lacks a foundation.”
· “Yo mama so full of nonsense, her boots are spurious.”
· “Yo mama’s reasoning is so flawed, she had to take art lessons so she could properly draw a conclusion.”
· “Yo mama so vulnerable to criticism, she—aww sorry, never mind.”
Happy Mother’s Day (on Sunday)!
