A. Surprising exactly zero people on the planet, a British investigation has concluded that Vladimir Putin likely ordered the 2006 poisoning murder of Alexander Litvinenko, an ex-KGB officer and vocal Putin critic. The Washington Post
B. A community college in Portland, OR has declared April “Whiteness History Month.” Good idea? Bad idea? Real life masquerading as a Portlandia episode? The Christian Science Monitor
C. Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia (known affectionately by friends and family as Scalizzle-my-bizzle) will be teaching Constitutional Law for Thomas Jefferson School of Law in San Diego… in France. Patch.com
D. Michigan governor sets aside $28 million to fix lead poisoning problem he created trying to save $5 million. The Wall Street Journal
E. As Ice-pocalypse 2016 bears down on the Eastern Seaboard, Blueprint employees in Los Angeles walk around in t-shirts. Huffington Post
