The Olympics are now in full swing, but you’d be forgiven for not realizing this if you’re currently studying for the LSAT. The LSAT has a tendency to take up all of your waking hours, filling your days with reading comp passages and countless logical reasoning problems. We feel your pain. While it’s important to do plenty of LSAT studying, it’s also important to take breaks to prevent your brain from slowly turning to mush. And what better way to take a break than by watching a quick Olympic event? Now that you can watch all the different sports streaming online, you pick and choose among your favorites. Below I’ve put together a list of Olympic events, and when’s a good time to watch them during your LSAT study.
Olympic Event #1 Perfect for LSAT Prep: 50km Racewalking
Purpose: Meaningless Background Noise
How is this even a sport? You couldn’t pay most people to watch someone walk thirty miles, but these men and women are considered to be athletes? This sport’s complete lack of entertainment value makes it a great choice for background noise. If your TV is tuned to racewalking, there’s no way you’ll be tempted to put down the LSAT, which will be downright thrilling by comparison.
Olympic Event #2 Perfect for LSAT Prep: Steeplechase
Purpose: Inspiration via Schadenfreude
The steeplechase really gives racewalking a run for its money in the pointless-and-boring-sports department. Although at least there’s actual, you know, running involved, which most people would find pretty important for a foot race. But with the steeplechase it basically looks like they made people run a track designed for horses, which involves jumping over immovable hurdles and goddamn puddles. This is a great way to remind yourself that you made the right decision by going to law school, because there’s plenty of sillier pursuits that you could have devoted your life to. At least you’re not one of these weirdos.
Olympic Event #3 Perfect for LSAT Prep: Amateur Boxing
Purpose: Catharsis
After slogging through your tenth logic game, there’s probably nothing you’d like more to do than punch something in the face. Since you can’t do that, why not watch large men (and now women!) punch each other in the face for sport! If you think the padding makes it less exciting, you can take comfort in knowing that even amateur boxing is likely to cause brain damage.
Olympic Event #4 Perfect for LSAT Prep: Soccer (also known as football by non-Americans and idiots)
Purpose: More Meaningless Background Noise
Officially the most boring sport in existence, soccer is a great way to get a boring background drone going. It’s possible you might get interrupted when someone scores a goal, but, thankfully, this doesn’t happen very often. Other good things to do during an Olympic soccer game include taking a nap, meditating silently, or really anything that requires a calm and unexciting environment.
Olympic Event #5 Perfect for LSAT Prep: Dressage
Purpose: Absolutely none
Dressage is also known as “horse ballet.” And that’s what it is. And it’s an Olympic sport. Really. Look. Once you’ve done that, allow yourself to slowly realize just how stupid and boring the Olympics are. Now that you’ve done that, think of all the time you’ve freed up for studying! Get back to work.